Sunday, December 19, 2004

Kids, Kids and More Freakin' Kids

Last weekend, Kim and Ed had a birthday party for K, their youngest offspring, since she'd just turned three. They can't throw a party for adults for anything, but they are becoming known for their kid's birthday parties.

All I know is that for 2 hours on what should've been a quiet Sunday afternoon, Hell opened up and let nine dancing demons out to harass and torment the Cats in the house. Sure, they look like mini-humans, but demons are what they are!

K had something called a "Princess" party, where the house seemed to sprout purple and pink ribbons (whoo hooo!), balloons (yikes!) and they even put up a tent that looked like a castle. (The Cats all thought it was for us, but boy did we find out different!) Now, tell me how two humans who have been owned by Cats all their lives can put up streaming strips of paper and NOT ALLOW the Cats to play with them. Sometimes Humans can be idiots. We have instincts, ya know. The strips sway and move. WE.JUST.GOT.TO.GET.THE.PAPER!!! But then the urchins started to arrive. Now, I hate to admit it, but I like humans. They're fun to watch, and if a human knows about Cats, they can be Very useful to provide scritches and dish out food. But the little ones ... the offspring ... now they can be downright evil. I have not been poked, prodded, picked up and chased more in a long time. Now, I wanted to stick around and see what was going on, but every time I was getting ready to find a prime spot out of reach, I kept getting moved somewhere that ended up be more accessible. Then some lady even carried me upstairs!! Well, I came and sat on the stairs and cursed her but good! Once the kids left, I was able to relax and it's a good thing that I take meds for my sore hips, or I would've been unable to move the next day.

A question about silly rites of sacrifice that humans seem to enjoy. I realize that they are primitive compared to Cats, but one of their birthday ceremonies is downright barbaric!! They took a small animal called something like a "Pinata" and HUNG it from a HOOK!!!! Then they allowed each offspring in turn to take a large stick and hit the poor beast until body parts started flying off until finally it's sides split and the guts fell out. Then they proceeded to EAT the OFFAL!!!!! Now like any self respecting Cat, I would love a good helping of raw meat, but this didn't smell like anything I'd want to eat. There was one little male that when given the stick, seemed to zone into his own world and beat the living sh*t out of the animal. It literally took four adults to grab him and bring him back to reality. Scary!

Why do humans breed?


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